The Evolution of Friends

I've written before about how much I loved my childhood. A major reason for that joy were the friends I had. We lived in a horseshoe neighborhood that was like a frat house for little kids. They were everywhere. I had a friend Andrew that lived two doors down, we were brothers separated by birth that united only years later. Andrew and I had a pack of friends we ran with that lived close. We were inseparable and vowed to be best friends for life. Then the first round of evolution began. High School came along and Andrew and I started getting interested in opposite things. That pack we ran with started to choose sides to align with and thus new groups were formed and best friends were made again.

High School marked the time of my buddy Brad and Greg becoming my brothers from another mother. We ran around together, played football together, and we thought we would be friends forever. We even decided to go to College together and live with one another for four years. That is when Evolution part two came.

College brought about more and more friends. Every class you went to and party attended you discovered a new friend, this is when Drew became my best friend. We did everything together. We both coached football, loved watching movies, and shared a mutual respect for one another in all areas. We pushed eachother in ways college buddies should and we thought we would be best friends forever. That is when Evolution part three came.

Teaching/Professional life. When I moved to Delaware and started teaching I lost touch with Drew, Brad, and Greg. We tried to keep in touch but we all went in our separate ways that didn't match up. I met a new group of friends. The social studies guys and Bill. I taught with all these guys and we ran around Delaware as the young group of guys and had a blast. Later we added a young buck Scott to the mix and the funniest guy we've ever met, Mcdonough. We all coached together or taught with eachother and it was great. That is when Evolution four came.

New Jobs/Dreams. People started leaving looking for new jobs, dreams, etc... that is when I left, pursuing a new job. We started to lose touch, besides the occasional email but for the most part the group was disbanded. There are a few friends that I still see but this is when Evolution five happens.

Baby. This summer we'll have a baby. This is going to start another evolution of friends. We'll see what comes from this, some might drop off, some might emerge but an evolution will surely happen. A kid changes everything, some people will be ok with that, some will not. Those that are will be a part of the next period in my life.

Over the past 28 years I have really had three friends that have crossed the evolutionary lines. My brother, Max, and Matt. I don't really see my brother that often, nor Max for that matter but we remain close. Matt has been one friend that I have had and still see at least a couple times a month. For starting out not even liking eachother Matt and I have become great friends.

It's funny to think about the evolution of friends. If you think about your own life I'm sure you can come up with your own evolutionary steps. I used to be perplexed by this but I realize it's part of life. Most people move away from their childhood friends, most people head in different directions, and most people start families or get different jobs at different times. It's the friends that you look back upon that make you who you are today. Whether you still talk to them or not you will always have a fond memory or moment you spent with them.

Tipping.

Not cow or drinking a beer, I'm talking about the type of tipping that you do at a restaurant or a taxi ride. I have a beef with this, you might say I have a very large beef with tipping. Why do we tip? Better yet, why do we tip the professions that we tip? We recently took a trip to NYC for christmas joy and it was just that, pure joy. However, we were forced into tipping left and right. We tipped the taxi driver after taking us to the hotel. We tipped the waiter at breakfast the next morning. We tipped the guy that let the horse drag us around Central Park. We tipped the waitress that night at dinner. We tipped the guy at breakfast again, and again the lady that brought us our food. We even tipped the door man for hailing us a cab, and finally, we tipped the taxi guy for bringing us back to the airport.

What did these clowns do that deserved extra money? Seriously. I ask you...blog reader, what did they do above and beyond their job to deserve more money? Why are we so conditioned to tip some jobs but not others? Why does a guy get an extra 4 bucks for driving me from point A to point B? That's his JOB! He is a taxi driver. He is supposed to drive me from A to B. Am I tipping him for not killing me in a crash? really? If he killed one person wouldn't he be fired from his taxi job? How about that waiter or waitress? Isn't she supposed to bring me my food? Isn't she supposed to fill up my water? That's her job description right? I'm not blowing her mind when I ask her what the steak is marinated in am I? The guy hailing me a cab, that's his job. The clown with the horse carriage, he should spend any and all extra money he receives on carrots for his horse.

I don't get it. I honestly don't. My father was a teacher/counselor and coach for 35 years. Did he receive one tip from a family that he helped by smacking their kid's mentality with a little common sense? What about a defensive end that he coached into a full out scholarship at THE ohio state university? Did that family come in and Tip him one tenth of the $26,000 a year they saved by not paying tuition? How about my mom that deals with autistic children all day long for 30 years? When they leave these kids that can't even use the restroom at the right time can balance a checkbook. Mom never came home from work with a smile and saying "you won't believe the Tip I got today from Johnny's family"

What about a doctor? The guy that just performed Triple Heart Bipass surgery to save your father or husband's life. Did you go tip them? Of course not. What about the farmer that grew that delicious corn you eat all summer long? Do you happen to take the time to husk a few dollars his way for his service?

The Garbage man? The guy that picks up your garbage. Deals with your, forgive my language, shit at the freezing dawn of the morning, all week. Do we tip them for removing this? No.

Heard of the swine flu? Oops, the H1N1. What about millions of people that received the vaccine? Did you? If you did, did you whip out a fiver for the nurse for delivering a perfect shot that maybe saved your life? What about the pharmacist that gives you the right medication? How about an extra coin in his pocket for giving you the right dosage?

I could honestly go on for the next six hours about people we tip but I have to go to dinner with my beautiful wife, and yes, we'll tip the food transporter for doing such a miraculous job that makes the emergency c-section being performed right now somewhere in the world as simple as sharpening a pencil.

rev-e-la-tion

the webster dictionary definition of revelation is: : something that is revealed; especially : an enlightening or astonishing disclosure

Let me tell you about a few revelations I had this weekend. I went to pittsburgh with my brother a few cronies to watch the UC vs Pitt football game.

Revelation....

1. Football played in snow is automatically much more exciting. Seeing elite athletes still perform at a high level in harsh elements is impressive. Imagine Lebron shooting a 3 with the air conditioning set to 32 degrees.

2. Being married means that when going out to the bar with guys on a roadtrip you don't have to worry about that awkward feeling of wanting to impress girls anymore, and it's great.

3. Wearing a ridiculously large coat or a baggy hooded sweatshirt to a college bar because of revelation #2 is totally normal.

4. If you have a friend that is in the military and home on leave....a night can be filled with making hilarious jokes about their jason bourne likeness.

5. Putting a panera in the bottom of a hotel is genius.

6. A late night food joint could serve anything at 2:30 a.m. and people will love it, even if they don't serve you the fountain drink that is promised with the special.

7. Pittsburgh fans love two things, blaming random fans for referee's bad calls and large push broom style mustaches.

8. A defensive coach should always wear short sleeves for four full quarters in the snow.

9. Always jump on the "we should do this" moments instead of finding excuses to not do something.

10. Last revelation I am discovering is that I stop lists at 10. I don't know what it is, but i hit ten and that feels right. Maybe I should have stopped at 6, or maybe should I keep going, but I'm going to stop.