The Engagement

Today marks the 4th year date of our engagement. If it were up to Lindsey we would have been engaged much earlier. The amount of pressure put on a guy to get engaged, then to plan the engagement is immense. Let's be honest, typically guys are awful at planning things, we just want to do it, be done, and move on. The whole idea of spending months planning and orchestrating is just exhausting. However, guys want to make their significant others happy, so we do it.

My time came. The day of being the single man was over. I went ring shopping with my buddy Jordan and decided on the perfect stone. Now it was time to design what would hold it. Knowing a little bit about what she wanted, I went on to design a ring that I thought would fit her perfectly.

The ring is a huge part, but it's not the only part. The other half of the equation is how to get that ring on her finger? Do you go the simple dinner out, pop on a knee? Maybe you're that guy that proposes at the ball game? In front of family? None of these would work for me. If you know me at all you know that at times I can be a bit over the top. This seemed to be one of those times that called for big plans.

Step one: Get the Father in Law blessing. I'm comfortable talking to anyone, but asking for the blessing is a pressure cooker man. We were sitting there on Derby Day I believe, which happens to be like a national holiday for my father in law. So, in my mind, why not ask him the most important question on the day he just wants to sit in his chair and watch races all day? Brilliant huh? So with Lindsey and her mom in the other room I dropped the ol' bomb on Gary and ask for his blessing. He agrees of course, but not sure if it was due to excitement or simply because the horses were at the gate and the next race was starting. I didn't tell the mother in law, and to this day I still get crap. Ha.

Step two: Think of the knockout plan. I had initially thought I would propose in California. We were heading there for Jordan's wedding, why not use the golden coast as my backdrop. Then I kept thinking about Meet the Parents, and checking the bag, losing the ring, and all of that so I backed out. Next was to do it at Florida with Lindsey's extended family all there on the beach. Then I realized I wasn't sure how much this family really liked me at the time, and to do that you have to be pretty confident that an excited response would be your return. So I settle on the best friend approach.

Step three: Secure the plan. I call Jess, Lindsey's best friend, to orchestrate this plan of deception on my future wife. We agree to tell her she is invited to South Carolina to help Jess plan her upcoming wedding to Lindsey's cousin. Lindsey of course has some reservations on the cost of flights and I need her to only buy a one way ticket, so we make up the idea that Jess has a "one way voucher" for a flight. My ever-trusting wife agrees, and purchases the one way ticket.

Step four: Details. Jess and I discuss the idea of proposing on this bridge that overlooks a waterfall and ravine. Perfect. Let's do it. The plan is in place.

Step five: Transportation. I didn't want to drive my new car, so I rented a standard pontiac grand am. I show up at the rental store and am asked why I am renting a car. So I explain the whole story, show the ladies the ring....bada bing...instant upgrade. I get the choice of the lot. I pick out a brand new SUV with all the bells and whistles. Girls love a mushy story.

Step six: Passengers. I didn't want to drive 9 hours alone, so I asked Lindsey's sister, Lana. We didn't really know eachother all that well, but I thought what the heck this is a good way to learn. We had a great time in the ride, screaming songs at the top of our lungs when we got a little stir crazy thru the mountains. Ate an amazing corn dog, and spent a lot of time getting to know each other.

Execution. Now that the time had come I was getting nervous because our entire plan hinged on good weather. I look up the weather report that morning and sure enough, rain. Toby, the cousin, picks us up and it is raining, like fat rain. We are talking in the car about our plan B, which of course we have no plan B so it's just "plan screwed". As we drive closer to the bridge the rain begins to stop. We park and walk to the bridge where I take my post, Toby and Lana go hide down the bridge so they can give me the signal (raise a leg when you see Lindsey coming). I am watching them but also thinking about the past 26 years. All those girlfriends and dates that led me to this point. It's funny, each person/date you learn something about yourself and what you're looking for in a spouse. You kind of owe them a thank you at that moment. I'm snapped back into reality when I see Toby pumping his leg like he's trying to stomp a family of oversized ants. I give a quick look to my left and see Jess and Lindsey walking toward me. I get that huge lump in my throat and reach for the ring in my pocket that I have now thumbed over a million times to make sure it's there.

This is it, I think to myself.

I spin around all hollywood style to surprise my future wife. With a stunned look on her face she reaches her hands to her mouth and can't audible a single thing. I pop down on one leg, say something that I honestly can't remember, and probably is a good thing. After gathering her senses she finally says yes (talk about sweating that out) and I put the ring on her finger. That moment it all comes full circle and you realize all that planning is worth it because of the phone calls and joy your fiance gets to make to tell everyone how it went down. Except that phone call to the mother in law that didn't know, sorry Kim!