Thursday, May 7, 2009

Go ahead and get fined...

I have a proposal for all of major league sports, so you so called kings of your sport listen up. There should be an offshore bank account, I am guessing it would be in Switzerland, that will hold all of the "broken money". I propose anytime an athlete breaks a rule and is fined, his money is automatically wired into this "broken money" account in the land of swiss. Think about it, the 7.6 million that Manny is being fined is deposited into this account.

Now, instead of the superstar laughing it off and this money disappearing, I suggest we make a right out of the wrong. The broken money account will go to fixing anything that needs a pick me up in the United States. Lets play with this idea....

Manny, we would like to thank you for your 7.6 million dollar contribution to our account. More importantly the 82,000 homeless people in LA county would like to thank you for putting them up in a hotel for the night at 90.00 rate/night. Go ahead Manny, be Manny.

Mark Cuban, your open line to our account showed some recent activity upwards of $25o,000 for complaining about refs. The inner city basketball league of Dallas would like to thank you for bank rolling their referee staff for the next 41,000 games at $50.00 per/game.

Mike Vick, we only get a part of your contribution slice, 2.4 million for your abuse of the dogs. The blind would like to thank you for funding the cost of 6 guide dogs at a rate of $380,000 per dog.

Chris Kunitz of the pittsburgh penguins, you were recently fined for hitting a goalie during your playoff game, so now you're hitting our bank account with $2,500, but more importantly the Pittsburgh city school system appreciates the increase in funding for their after school bullying program.

Serena Williams, tennis star with a bad mouth, you were fined $1,500 for obscene language, our account manager will be happy to spend that for you as a donation to the cure of breast cancer.

Kenyon Martin, you were recently fined $25,000 for a hard foul, your deposit is going towards the purchase of 20,000 cheese coneys to be delivered to all of the UC dorm rooms around 3 a.m......courtesy of their favorite alum.

There is a lot of good that can be done with broken money. With so many athletes earning their biggest contract ever and signing huge bonuses, don't you think even their mistakes could be turned into someone else's bonus?

5 comments:

bshawise said...

brilliant.

make it so.

Scotty Mo said...

Love it!

Martin said...

Here is an idea: Go ahead and listen


http://www.savethewhales.org/stwsong_hi.html

Anonymous said...

Send this idea to someone in the know. It has
possibilities.

Mike McDonough said...

Those coneys would have come in handy back in college during one of my many visits to Clifton, aka the home of the Bearcats